Increase the chances of cooperative behavior by sharing the plan with your child and telling them exactly what you expect. This happens right before the situation.
Discuss what’s coming, what’s happened in the past, and ask your child to describe how they should behave. Discuss the rewards and consequences of misbehaviour. Explain how time-out will be used outside the home so they know what to expect.
Discuss with your child two or three rules for the situation. Remember the rules should be stated positively (e.g., ‘play nicely’ rather than ‘don’t fight’).
Explain what’s about to happen
“Ok Ollie, Let's go through the plan for today. We're going to Sandy and Rik's to have some lunch. We'll be there for a couple of hours. Ethan will be there too...”
Explain what’s happened in the past... the good and the bad
“Now in the past you and Ethan have played really nicely together but last time you two had a fight.”
Ask your child how they should behave this time
“What do you think the rules should be for how you play with Ethan today?..... Yep, you got it. Today you need to play nicely and share with Ethan and the other kids.”
Discuss rewards and consequences
“If you follow the rules, we'll stop at the shops on the way home and get a new ball together. If that doesn't happen, you'll have to go to time out. Ok?”